You read that right. Not anybody, my body. Yeah, my body that used to respond to deprivation of all things tasty and ridiculous exercise. No more, I tell you! How can I be running absurd distances, eating pretty darn healthy (valentines exception), constantly be chasing after a very fast crawler, but still not be improving? I am at my pre-pregnancy weight, and my clothes fit, so I guess I shouldn’t complain, but there is no way I am wearing a bathing suit this year. I have thought, maybe if I get tan enough, it will be better. I ran the idea past my mom to pierce my belly button just as a distraction…I could see her keel over through the phone. Haha. That’s my Mom. I don’t want to tell God how to do His job or anything, but seriously, this area could have used some improving. There should be some intense post-baby tightening hormones that work much like a face lift, just further south. I had a feeling this would happen, and that is why while my Dr. was doing the c-section to deliver my massive child, I was begging him to do a little nip/tuck. It makes perfect sense. Shoot, I might have even snuck him a few $20s on his way out. Now I find myself judging the plastic Californian women a little bit less. I have always liked watching Dr. 90210. Maybe I should pay him a little visit. Hmmm. I guess that is something my husband would find out about, huh? All the men are probably so grossed out right now. Wait, do men read this? At least you moms are agreeing with me…well, I think you are. Crap, am I the only one in this boat? Oh, and you poor girls that dream of being mommies; you might be doing some serious reconsideration. So sorry! Oh, well. I know my body will never be perfect, but I do know one thing is for sure . When I lay down with Cooper to put him to bed, he throws his little arm around my neck and squishes his face against mine. While I am waiting for him to fall asleep, I know that I would do anything, give up anything, change anything to be right there. To be his mom.