I’ll be honest and tell you that I’ve hesitated to write Lincoln’s birth story. I feel bad saying that, but I think it’s mostly because it’s not exactly the story I wanted. The outcome is perfect, recovery is going great, but the actual birth? Not that awesome. But, I’ll tell you anyway, because I tell y’all everything!
There was no crazy long labor like with Cooper, no in the middle of labor spray tanning like with Callan, but just enough drama to fit in, I guess.
Friday, September 4, I was scheduled for my c-section at 7:15am. I got up crazy early to be at the hospital by 5am. I was a hot mess on the way. I was so disappointed that I hadn’t gone into labor earlier and that I wasn’t going to be able to try for a natural birth. There was absolutely a sense of excitement about it being Lincoln’s birthday, but I was really nervous about this c-section.
For those of you who don’t know, I had a spinal fusion when I was 15 for scoliosis. This means that the vertebra in my spine from my neck to waist are all fused together with metal rods. What that means for a c-section, is that it’s very difficult to put in the spinal block that makes you numb for surgery. Luckily, they had success finding a unfused area in my previous births and we had gotten the paperwork from the anesthesiologists that had worked on me before. It should be easy, if they just went in the same spot that had worked before, but I was still very nervous.
We got into the prep room around 5:15am, where I changed and we sat. And sat. The waiting was not fun! We filled out all the papers and signed my life away. Had a minute to see the doctors and then off we went. They told us we couldn’t bring a camera into the OR and I was so sad that we couldn’t get those first pictures of our sweet babe! The Hubs had to stay in the recovery room and wait for me to get the anesthesia and be all prepped for the surgery.
Walking into the OR, I was literally shaking from being so scared. Or maybe it was because it’s freezing in there. I remember taking some deep breaths, praying for peace and telling myself that I was about to meet my baby. I grabbed onto a nurses hands while they attempted the spinal block. And I say attempted, because that’s what happened for what felt like an eternity. After I felt the needle go in 3 or 4 times, I knew they weren’t finding the spot. I could feel the needle scraping the bone in my spine and when I told them, no one said anything back to me. After I asked what was happening a couple times, my Doctor came right over in front of me. I said to her “it’s not working, is it?” she said “no, but we’re taking our time. It’s okay.” I felt my heart sink. I didn’t want to go under general anesthesia and miss those first sweet cries. A couple more attempts and they decided to move low, under my fusion. This meant that I would be numb much lower and feel more in my torso. There were a couple tries there before I felt a weird jolt down my right leg. They took the needle out and back in for an 8th time, then success. 8 times getting a huge needle in my spine and mercy, I felt it for days after.
Once I was numb and laying down on the table, I felt like crap. I told them I was going to get sick a few times and they put a little basin by my mouth. Not feeling anything and having your arms tied down makes it hard to puke, fyi. But after that, all the bright lights turned into one, big white blob and I was down for the count. Not sure for how long, but I really thought I was heading to heaven. It was a weird feeling. When I woke up, I could smell smelling salts and my Doctor was telling everyone that I was “coming to”. I’m just glad The Hubs wasn’t in there because he would have lost it, I’m sure.
After that, The Hubs was able to finally come in. I was really relieved to see him and they started the surgery. I’ve always felt pressure during my c-sections, but this time it hurt. Like, I could feel a lot. I guess it’s because they had to do the spinal block so much lower? But it wasn’t comfy.
After about 20 minutes, I heard that sweet cry all of us mommy’s are longing to hear, no matter how you deliver your baby. So much relief is held in those tiny baby cries. They lifted my little man up so I could see him and I couldn’t believe how small he was! Not that he was a tiny baby, just so tiny for my babies.
7lbs 3oz, 21″. My little Lincoln James was born and was mine.
We were in recovery awhile, where we snuggled, cried, stared at the newest member of our family and thanked God everyone was safe and sound. It felt like I had been up a whole day, but it was really only 8am.
My mom brought Cooper and Callan to the hospital around lunchtime and it was pure magic watching them meet their baby brother. They were so sweet, holding and kissing him. Cooper, especially, was completely smitten and wanted to stay the night at the hospital with me. They both have been amazing big brothers already!
After telling you all about how terrified my surgery was, I can say that my recovery has been really great. My whole torso was super bruised after I got home and my belly button is still a bit black and blue. Not sure why I had that this time and not the others, but that was literally the only post surgery problem. I feel almost back to normal and it’s been less than 3 weeks.
I spent so much time before Lincoln’s birth stressing about going into labor, attempting a vbac and having another c-section. Now, even though it was a scary experience, I could care less that my “perfect” plans didn’t work out. I have my sweet baby in my arms (literally right now as I one hand type) and my heart feels so full. I was blessed to deliver a healthy baby and grateful for technology that was there to assist when my body just wasn’t doing it’s thing.
It’s been almost 3 weeks and I’m loving this mom of 3 thing. Sure I feel pulled in many directions right now, but every way I turn, I feel loved. There’s something so special about how a boy loves his mom and I’m so excited I get 3 times the fun!